I have been called critically feminist, I have been called angry and not nice, and actually some people are of the opinion that I may never find a husband.
I’m so feminist and unapologetically so. Why should I apologize for believing that human beings should be equal? Why should I be ashamed that I feel like human decency amongst other things is not a female thing? Why should I be sorry because I believe that equality is an idea that will put an end to the suffering of women all around the world. Why should I apologize for believing that a person should not be marginalized because of their genitalia?
I have been in super awkward situations where some sorry excuse for “men” thought I knew too much about politics and education and by virtue of that I might not find a husband, the worst however are the ones who marvel that despite the burden of two breasts and a vagina I have still found the time to have a good head on my shoulders.
Woman is the Nigger of the world – John Lennon
I was in church earlier in the week and after service, meetings were called. Men and women were to hold several meetings so the men sat on the right side of the church while the women picked the left side. As we were about to start, the women leader said to my hearing, “Ladies let’s sit in a circle so we sit together so we don’t make too much noise and disturb the men! I subconsciously said aloud why? Are men allergic to noise, more so, they are making their own noise and sufficiently so?
Then she said, “Well, I want us to keep our planning to ourselves so everybody doesn’t hear”. That’s a better reason I remarked. I believe her, she’s such a sweet, considerate lady but her first remark already got my juices flowing. I actually typed this post, right there in the meeting.
I know that people may find me annoying but on no account shall I be shut up, I shall not be a party to any circumstance where the voice of more than 20 women be kept quiet for one singular reason. We do not want to disturb the men.
Let’s pause for a minute, how many times has a group of Nigerian men ever cared about disturbing women? (That question is so pregnant; you don’t want to get me started) In fact, in that particular minute the men were making so much noise we could barely hear each other but no, let us keep quiet because the men must not be disturbed.
You may call me critically feminist and claim that the women leader was just being considerate but I’ll stop you there and say that it is not a woman’s thing to be considerate, it’s a human thing.
The idea of inequality between men and women is what perpetrates the idea that women owe some duty to be more considerate. We are human beings be it male or female and we CO inhabit the earth and we all owe the duty of care to make the existence of our neighbors that much livable.
Not male or female. We are human beings.